Dreamin' of a White Dragon
Second Fiddle – that should’ve been my name. Think I’m being a Drama Queen? Adding too much spice to my Gingerbread? Well, strap yourselves in, my sleigh-ridin’ slouches as I drop some truth on ya’.
Try being the sister of the one and only Jessica Kringle-Claus, aka Mrs. Claus. Add to that the fact that I’m the Goddess of Winter and the only deity who spends six months in hibernation and put the damn cherry on the figgy pudding with when I tell you that the only reason anyone even knows my damn name is because I can make it snow.
Woohoo, blah, bah-humbug!
Now try your darnedest to convince me that you wouldn’t be slammin’ on the tiara, grabbin’ the scepter, and listin’ your complaints like they were bad kids on Santa’s Naughty List.
Yeah, that’s what I thought.
Well, this year I’m changing the rules.
There’ll be no Snow, no North Wind for Santa’s stupid sleigh, and no, I mean definitely-no-way-no-how-no nip in the air for the tip of your disgusting little noses.
I’m taking a stand. The buck stops here – and you better believe I mean every single one of those frikkin’ prancin’ Reindeer.
No more Second Fiddle for me.
My name is Cailleach Bheur and I’m here to screw with your holidays.
And you can blow that right out the toe of your stickin' stocking for all I care!
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