My Own Sunrise by Sandor Lubisch

My Own Sunrise

by Sandor Lubisch

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My Own Sunrise by Sandor Lubisch
Members of my family worked for the Federal Government and were fearful of my sexuality due to the 1950s Lavender Scare when homosexuals were barred from working for the Federal government. Hundreds were outed, forced to quit, or fired from their government jobs.

My parents, being traditional Orthodox Jews, were taught homosexuality was a biblical abomination. They must have sensed something was different about me and didn’t know where to get help. In the 1950s and 1960s, there were no support organizations and services for parents of LGBTQ children. Today’s Pride movement didn’t exist.

The American Psychiatric Association listed homosexuality as a psychiatric disorder and termed it a sociopathic disturbance until 1973. Disabled children were often regarded as a family curse and parents kept their children’s disability, including homosexuality, a secret from others.

I felt very alone and didn’t think anyone else was like me. I didn’t conclude I was gay until my mid-twenties. Being a public school teacher in the 1970s, I faced being fired for not adhering to “community standards”. I needed to be very discrete and secretive about my sexuality. I wanted to meet others like me and to find love.

My name is Charlie Horent. This is my story.

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